Tough.

Pugs were made to put costumes on. In fact, I’m thinking of trying to get my pug a modeling career so that I don’t have to worrry about making a living anymore, since that doesn’t seem to be going so well for me now that I’ve mostly sworn off high-tech as an income source.

So if anyone knows of a good agent for dogs, Snuffy is ready to get to work! He looks especially good in crotchless bodysuits.

And, in writing news, since that is ostensibly what this site is about, I’ll be speaking at the Write on the Sound conference in…get this…October! I don’t think I’ve ever planned so far ahead in my life. I’ll be talking about blogging, natch, and how as a writer, you need to start a blog to become rich and famous, and of course I’ll show you how. (To start a blog that is.)

More details to come soon on my appearances and teaching page.

The new novel inches ever-so-slowly-and-painfully-forward. It did have the working title “The Rock Star” but the other day I walked past the bargain bin outside Twice Sold Tales and saw a big, deliciously trashy-looking hardback by Jackie Collins entitled “Rock Star!” The best part was her huge, super-eighties-looking photo on the back, complete with feathered, hairsprayed hair.

I decided I needed to change the working title after that, but WHO AM I KIDDING? I would love to sell as many books as Jackie F*cking Collins!

Meanwhile, ahem. The first novel continues to live its secret and sometimes not-so-secret life. “James” from Austin contacted me to tell me had had found it in the Rancho Mirage Library in Southern California and that the title had “spoken to him” because he just split with his fiancee…it was spotted around town in the window of the Fremont Place Book Company (who has kindly been featuring it almost ever since it came out)…it has 11 reviews and an average rating of 3.64 (out of 5) on GoodReads… It is hovering around 800,000 on Amazon (where it’s rated four out of five stars) and you can still buy it *new* there but you can also also get a copy for a mere .01 cents! So if you haven’t read it by now, Good Lord, what are you waiting for?

As always, you can find out more about my OH-SO-EXCITING PERSONAL LIFE at SparklySparkly.com.

Ignoring that frightening fact, check out my article about Mount Rainier that just came out today - and no that grammatical error/typo in the second paragraph is not mine! Grr. That grouse aside, I do love writing for the PI because they don’t edit my articles heavily. Having recently experienced some very heavyhanded editing, I appreciate the light touch more than ever because of course my writing is of course PERFECT when it comes out the gate! (Kidding all you editors out there.)

In other writing news, I will soon be teaching an online blogging class for the Editorial Freelancer’s Association - which means you can participate even if you don’t live in Seattle!

In still more — completely unrelated — news, this story about a playful dolphin who saved two beached whales made me cry my eyes out when I was in a particularly hormonal mood yesterday.

Finally, for more of my recent blogging, see SparklySparkly or the Mount Rainier Climbing blog.

Also — try to contain your excitement — but the full archives have been restored to Breakup Babe! Lacking a better technical solution, they are all on one HUMONGOUS page, so you might have to wait a little bit for it to load. But don’t give up hope! After a few-second wait you will be rewarded with years worth of posts about my lovably messed-up love life.

You can check out a photo of me looking rather vampire-like on the photographer Barbie Hull’s blog, taken at the recent Girl Power Hour event. If only I could have 100 cocktail-drinking women as an audience every time! (You have to scroll down the page a bit to see aformentioned vampire-like photo). It was a fun, friendly event and I will definitely go again, even when I am not one of the star attractions.

That’s the fiction-writing life anyway. In other, less exalted arenas, I am getting paid for my writing. (’Buy this product from xyz GiantSoftwareCompany! It’s sooo awesome!’) A few articles of mine grace the glossy magazines around town. I’m getting paid to teach writing. The occasional check comes in from a store that is selling my book on consignment. (As for royalties, ha ha ha).

It’s just life, really. I always thought when I became a published author that I would become an incandescent, glamorous being who churned out beautiful yet hilarious works of fiction on a regular basis and never 1)went on unemployment 2)struggled through horrible drafts and crises of faith and 3)got ignored or rejected by editors again.

Obviously, none of this is true. In a way, becoming a published novelist changed nothing and changed everything at the same time.

Now that I’ve completely exhausted my profundity for the day, I point you to my other blog where I’ve recently written in my trademark whiny yet witty style.

One more thing - if you happen to be a girl and you happen to live in Seattle, you can come see my speak (briefly) and socialize network at an upcoming Girl Power Hour this Thursday in lower Queen Anne.

Hope to see you there!
Rebecca

And if you live in Seattle, don’t forget to stop by Peridot on Friday to drink wine, shop for beautiful clothes and jewelry, and buy my book. Oh you have my book already you say? Well doesn’t someone on your gift list need it? Many someones perhaps? As I like to say, it’s the perfect gift for the recently dumped or the about-to-be-dumped. Or anyone who has ever had to date, period.

This is the spiel I will be giving all night long on Friday. It’s rather humbling trying to sell ones wares in person. A book is not an easy sell. But at least BreakupBabe has that great colorful cover that jumps out at people and a topic they can all relate to. That makes my job a little easier. The wine should help too.

National Novel Writing Month - which we are in the thick of as we speak! I love it that someone is telling me exactly how many words I must write every single day (1667!) and that I MUST make it happen or risk losing all sense of self-worth. (Or at least the chance to finish the draft of an exceedingly-crappy-yet-with-seeds-of-if-not-exactly-brilliance-then-not-so-crappy-stuff).

The gym. Now that I have established a routine whereby I go every single day at noon, nothing or no one can try to stop me or they risk getting hit in the head with my ancient blue Nike gym bag or even worse - being forced to smell the inside of it!

My morning routine. Every morning I go to Uptown Espresso to write and order an extra hot grande soy latte. Today, when a barista I’d never seen before put my coffee in a “tall” ceramic cup, instead of the “grande” glass which I *so* enjoy, things turned unpleasant.

“They always put it in the big glass,” I say sullenly, in pre-coffee, don’t-cross-me-motherf*cker mode.

“You ordered an extra-hot, right? This is what we put it in.” Now this is not true. Maybe it is true under whatever rock he crawled out from but it is not true for ME NOW HERE.

“THEY ALWAYS PUT IT IN THE BIG GLASS,” I say more loudly now, as in I AM ABOUT TO HAVE A TANTRUM.

Luckily for him he puts it in the big glass. Now I can proceed with the rest of my day, thank you very much: writing 1667 words, going to the gym at noon, reading a book before I go to sleep in utter silence, and waking up to my grande extra hot soy latte in the BIG GLASS all over again tomorrow.

The first time I did it was in 2003, when I wrote the first draft of my soon-to-be-bestselling-any-day-now-c’mon-people-and-just-buy-it-will-you novel, BreakupBabe. Oh did that first draft suck and I hardly used a word of it later on but just writing it was an important step - probably the most important step - in writing what would ultimately be my published book.

I won’t bore you with why I haven’t done it the last few years (I’ve tried) but it’s 2007 and I’m gonna make it work this year. I’M GOING TO, DAMN IT.

Meanwhile, I’m trying to think of any interesting writing-related tidbits to give you. I’m currently working on another freelance article for Seattle Metropolitan Magazine. This is the article I risked life and limb (and got soaking wet) for, and then, because that trip didn’t make for compelling copy, I went out and got soaking wet again trip (but at least I didn’t risk life and limb that time). Now I’m just procrastinating on the writing part because I’d rather daydream about the characters in my latest story - who may or may not surive after this first-draft-writing-process.

I’ve been writing a little more on SparklySparkly than here lately so check it out - if you want to read things about oh, my lack of sweaters, my impatience with people who abuse punctuation, and other such deep and profound things.

*I still do most of my writing at Uptown Espresso in lower Queen Anne, where my current favorite drink is a grande, extra-hot soy latte. (Oh God, that is so boring, please forgive me. I think you’ll find the next tidbit more juicy…)

*Recently, the first person I ever kissed (I mean, really kissed, because I don’t count that horrible experience with my first high school boyfriend drooling all over me two years previously) saw the copy of BreakupBabe that is currently displayed in one of my other favorite coffee shops, El Diablo, and contacted me - after 21 years! We met while working in this theater - which is now very posh but was once a seedily elegant Art Deco place where you could see good indie films — and shared our fateful kiss in the balcony.

*I have an idea for a new novel. Maybe. Whether or not this turns out to be the *one*, you can expect any novel I write in the near future to include the following themes: rock music, high school friendships, obsessive crushes, and pop culture.

*I’ve discovered that finding an idea to write about is a lot like dating. There are a lot of false starts and initial excitement; a lot of thoughts like “this is the one!” before you realize that your idea might look all shiny and pretty but is, in fact, not for you. Even when you DO find the right idea, as I did with BreakupBabe, you have to endure a lot of initial angst (the first draft of that novel was SOOOOO bad; come to think of it, the second and third weren’t so great, either), and it’s only by really believing the idea that you can work through that.

*I envy those slutty writers who have one good idea right after another - bam, bam, bam - but I’m just not one. I’m saving myself for the right idea, I guess. But it’s sure hard to be patient sometimes.

You know what this means, right? You better buy up some copies FAST, have me sign them, and then you can auction them off for lots of money! Why you might even be able to purchase that yacht you’ve been dreaming of, or maybe even your own island! Just invest in one of the .87 cents copies also available on Amazon.com, ask me to sign a bookplate and send it to you, then put on Amazon for 100 times what you paid for it = instant wealth!

Though I have to wonder how seller ZONTIK2 from New Jersey ended up with a signed copy in the first place and how he/she could bear to part with it?

Not for me to ponder such mysteries, I guess. I will be most curious to see if anyone buys this collectible item - not that I will see a penny for it. But that’s OK. We all know I’m not in this for the money. Ahem.